Even the most aggro pro-organic people seem to admit this. Barring weeding by hand which is insane even for a small lawn, the organic solution seems to be to accept about 20% clover and other weeds (also mow high and frequently, fertilize with the clippings, and water deep and infrequently). Doesn't look as sharp but after a mowing they aren't that different from the rest of the lawn for the functional purposes like kids playing or dogs peeing, without the chemicals so you don't kill your soil or potentially poison the kids and dogs. And it's less work. I used to love me some lawn chemicals but I've fully converted. To build on your sex with mother nature analogy, it's like woman on top - lay back and let her do her thing, it might not go exactly the way you want but it's still pretty damn good.

You do that and the next thing you know you’ve got a Katrina, Thai tsunami, or Haitian earthquake. No, you need to keep her in check. Look, here’s an artist rendering:

Okay, see… that’s Mother Nature on the right in the white. The big dude in the black helmet – that’s a composite of companies like Ortho, Scotts, Toro, Black and Decker, Craftsman, et al. And the guy on the left is this photo’s version of Jesus, who’s always with you.

I don't know if its available outside of Wisconsin, but you might want to try some Milorganite on it. Milorganite is tiny pellets of processed sewage of the good people of Milwaukee. I use it on a large number of potted plants I have outside, not the lawn, and it seems to work quite well for that purpose. The only thing I'd be worried about would be using it too often on food plants for fear of building up heavy metals in the soil. I don't know if it's the brats or the beer, but it seems to work quite well.